As children grow, they show different traits, some likable and some unlikeable. Being stubborn falls in the latter category, not that we’re saying that such children shouldn’t be loved the same way. At the end of the day, children are like wet mud, and they’ll mold the manner we mold them. So, it would be wrong to blame the children.
Similarly, one cannot blame the parents entirely either. Being a parent is a difficult, full-time, and hands-on responsibility. Sometimes, some things aren’t in our control, and a parent might unintentionally portray something that a child misunderstands as rightful behavior. This act could lead to a stubborn child. Here are 7 parenting tips to deal with stubborn children.
1. Don’t order, give choices- No one likes being told what to do all the time, right? Do we as adults enjoy it? Children, too, like to feel respected much like we expect them to respect us. So, when you say, “Go brush your teeth right now,” try saying, “Do you want to brush your teeth first or clean up your room?” In this manner, they know they have to do both but have a choice with what to do first.
2. Approach their moods patiently- A child reflects what they see at home or school. When they see their parent lose their cool every time something’s going wrong, they’ll pick up the same habit. If the child is upset, ask them what’s making them upset rather than asking them to stop crying/screaming.
3. Make them aware of the consequences- When you teach your child about good and bad, instruct them about the consequences of those situations. For example, say you are teaching your child to brush their teeth twice a day or to sleep on time. Saying, “Because you just have to do it” is not a valid reason. Imagine if someone gave us this answer? Give them the consequence- what would happen to their teeth if they don’t brush twice, what is the benefit of sleeping early, etc.
4. Speak about positive rewards- When a child is not at his or her best behavior at times, it is best to talk to them about the positive rewards. Rather than scolding them about the things they CAN NOT have or do if they don’t behave or follow rules, talk to them about the things they CAN have or do if they abide. Something to think about, right?
5. Distract Them- Lack of attention or boredom could also lead to stubborn behaviors. Try cuddling them at such times or distracting them with something else so they can break from that mood.
6. Acknowledge their Emotions- Much like us, children are also allowed to feel a lot. In fact, they feel a lot more since they’re also struggling with expressing things and now understanding a lot around the world. Don’t tell them not to feel in a particular way. Give them a gentle touch or hug, and tell them you understand, and that things will get better. If required, talk to them about dealing with the situation. Kids understand everything when explained!
7. Discipline them with a routine- Children who stick to a routine tend to behave less stubbornly. Give them a routine to follow. If they’re in an age where they can understand images or read, give them a list every day and they can strike their tasks off with a crayon. They’ll not just enjoy it but also feel more responsible. Reward them with something in return!
